We've all heard what comes around goes around...which I believe to an extent. While I would never wish illwill on anyone or take pleasure in seeing someone else struggle, I feel this needs to be clarified.
I have seen others say Karma is a B*tch...I don't believe that. Karma does not project the bad. I think Karma is out there just spreading the love, that if you put good out there, you will receive it back, often 10 fold. If you think Karma puts bad out there, I think you are mistaken, maybe you've just not put the love out to begin with...and when I mean put it out there, I mean put it out there freely, with NO EXPECTATIONS in return. With expectations come a sense of entitlement and that is a thing none of us have, a sense to be entitled to anything, and that can lead us down a dark path that I'd care not to get into.
Life isn't measured by talley marks on some chalkboard to see who has accumulated enough good deeds to get to the next level. Those who live a peacefully life really just do because it feels good to be nice, they don't want anything in return, and when nice is returned, they are truly grateful for it. Simple. Yes, I know it can seem that we get our fair share of crapola, and trust me, I've had mine and will still continue to have it come my way, the difference is in our attitude and how we chose to deal with it. Yes, we have a choice!
Now, my blog isn't about wanting to change anyone. I accept people for who they are, and can embrace that we all have our place. My purpose when I share is to often give another way of looking at things, just a simple way of showing that there is good out there and that it's up to the individual to at least respectfully see the other side. While I don't expect anyone to jump on my bandwagon or even have to agree with me, but the simple respect of acknowledging that I too have a want to be understood. I think that is what is hard with those who say they are misunderstood, they don't want to understand another, so their frustrations with things come back on them.
I don't feel I am misunderstood...can what I've said be misconstrued, yes, but that is on the individual who is trying to pass judgement on me. That is why I ask other's to explain, it's not a challenge but a way for me to try to see their side. If I ask questions, it's not to evoke anger, but to clairify. Communication is a funny thing since we all have different ways of doing so, but lack of or just using what I call "blanket statements" does not solve anything, only further perpetuates the unknown. Life was meant to be shared with others and to learn from them as well, and you can't just share yourself without accepting another's idea's or ways of looking at things, without thinking it's an attack on you.
Our society was meant to be shared and respected, I feel as though a lot of that has once again gone by the wayside. It stems back to the simple things of treating other's how you would like to be treated, if you don't want someone to spaz out on you, don't spaz out on them; if you don't want someone to judge you, don't judge them; be kind, be understanding and put forth that positive energy, be grateful, once you do those simple things, I think the fog will be lifted and Karma will be returning the positve right back at ya!
So go ahead, put out that good, be nice and see what comes back. Find a way to rethink something that may upset you and ask what that other person may be going through. Instead of being upset that something "bad" happened to you, reassess and look at what IS ok. Emotions are just judgements, life isn't meant to be a rollercoaster full of ups and downs, it's about being able to go over the dips in stride, so hold on and go for that ride, put those emotions in check (seatbelt/coping skills) and journey on!
Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Painting the world with gratitude!
It seems as though we are plagued by a society that only wants to gripe, whine and complain...they think the more worse off things are, the more attention or sympathy you get. Facebook world has turned into Gripebook all too often...I have a love hate relationship with such part of FB.
We are now entering November, the month that hosts Thanksgiving. I love this holiday for all it's simplicity, but our society has often skipped this one. To me it's all the more reason to celebrate it, as I think the world is not grateful for the simple things any more.
We focus too much on the bad, the ugly and what we don't have. If you are one of the grateful ones who make the most out of life, you are looked upon in a light that others often shun you for since you DO see the good, you don't sweat the small stuff and you are able to just be in the gratitude attitude. What will it take to let the world see that we need to get back to the thanksgiving in every day life?
If I could take out a big paintbrush and paint the world happy I sure would. To be able to open other's eyes to the fact that we really do have more than what we need, that the things in life that pop up are only temporary and aren't meant to destroy or frustrate us but to have us take a step back, breathe and be grateful! Yes, I truly mean that.
Last week I received notice that my name has come to the top of a list for a fix it up grant for my home. I could really use new windows and doors for my house. I was excited! Really excited. I got all my paperwork filled out and ready to go, then I read the last page, the income guidelines, I made $400 too much to qualify for this deal. Really?? Yes, I was disappointed, but I guess that meant I was doing ok, that there are others out there that really need this more than I do. I am grateful that I do have a house, that my windows are intact and that I do make the wages that I am able to. Life is good, I have what I need.
I listen to a lot of people, I observe a lot of things, I am saddened when I see those who don't see the world for the good that it is. Our news casts are full of negative, it's as if unless it's bad, they cannot report it. I have quit watching the news at night since it seems that the news isn't so bad in the morning light. I listen to clients talk about what goes wrong in their every day life, I read all the negative outbursts on FB, and I used to be part of a group of friends that all they did was complain about being mom's and wives. STOP, JUST STOP!
The other day a man walked into the salon...I've cut his hair several times and his demeanor is always the same...happy and grateful. See, this man is in his late 50's and over 30yrs ago he was in a bad car accident; he has a TBI, scars all over him, walks with a severe limp and cane, he stammers with his speech and is unable to work. This man is RICH in my eyes...he has his brothers near by who farm his families land and share from their gardens with him, he chops his own wood to heat his house, he has neighbors who share beef and deer meat with him, he is able to drive and get around. He tells me every time how lucky he is to be here and able to see his nephew's grow up and that someone out there has it way worse than he does. AMEN! If half, just half of the people out there had this man's attitude, I do believe that the world would be in a better state.
I challenge each and every one of us to really think this month, think of what we say or complain about. Think that someone out there has it worse off than you. Keep a gratitude journal, write one thing that you are thankful for on the calendar each day; maybe update your FB with a grateful statement instead of the disdain of daily gripes, or please, for one month, just.don't.gripe! Yes, after a month of gratitude, it WILL change your attitude. I was told it takes 21 days to change a habit, let this be the month that some of us change the complaining one! (yes, even complaining about complaining is still complaining ;-p )
Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!
We are now entering November, the month that hosts Thanksgiving. I love this holiday for all it's simplicity, but our society has often skipped this one. To me it's all the more reason to celebrate it, as I think the world is not grateful for the simple things any more.
We focus too much on the bad, the ugly and what we don't have. If you are one of the grateful ones who make the most out of life, you are looked upon in a light that others often shun you for since you DO see the good, you don't sweat the small stuff and you are able to just be in the gratitude attitude. What will it take to let the world see that we need to get back to the thanksgiving in every day life?
If I could take out a big paintbrush and paint the world happy I sure would. To be able to open other's eyes to the fact that we really do have more than what we need, that the things in life that pop up are only temporary and aren't meant to destroy or frustrate us but to have us take a step back, breathe and be grateful! Yes, I truly mean that.
Last week I received notice that my name has come to the top of a list for a fix it up grant for my home. I could really use new windows and doors for my house. I was excited! Really excited. I got all my paperwork filled out and ready to go, then I read the last page, the income guidelines, I made $400 too much to qualify for this deal. Really?? Yes, I was disappointed, but I guess that meant I was doing ok, that there are others out there that really need this more than I do. I am grateful that I do have a house, that my windows are intact and that I do make the wages that I am able to. Life is good, I have what I need.
I listen to a lot of people, I observe a lot of things, I am saddened when I see those who don't see the world for the good that it is. Our news casts are full of negative, it's as if unless it's bad, they cannot report it. I have quit watching the news at night since it seems that the news isn't so bad in the morning light. I listen to clients talk about what goes wrong in their every day life, I read all the negative outbursts on FB, and I used to be part of a group of friends that all they did was complain about being mom's and wives. STOP, JUST STOP!
The other day a man walked into the salon...I've cut his hair several times and his demeanor is always the same...happy and grateful. See, this man is in his late 50's and over 30yrs ago he was in a bad car accident; he has a TBI, scars all over him, walks with a severe limp and cane, he stammers with his speech and is unable to work. This man is RICH in my eyes...he has his brothers near by who farm his families land and share from their gardens with him, he chops his own wood to heat his house, he has neighbors who share beef and deer meat with him, he is able to drive and get around. He tells me every time how lucky he is to be here and able to see his nephew's grow up and that someone out there has it way worse than he does. AMEN! If half, just half of the people out there had this man's attitude, I do believe that the world would be in a better state.
I challenge each and every one of us to really think this month, think of what we say or complain about. Think that someone out there has it worse off than you. Keep a gratitude journal, write one thing that you are thankful for on the calendar each day; maybe update your FB with a grateful statement instead of the disdain of daily gripes, or please, for one month, just.don't.gripe! Yes, after a month of gratitude, it WILL change your attitude. I was told it takes 21 days to change a habit, let this be the month that some of us change the complaining one! (yes, even complaining about complaining is still complaining ;-p )
Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Reflections
I'm not talking about what you see in the mirror...wait, maybe there is a bit of that too. Ugh, well, let me reflect. If you don't take time for yourself, you will not like who you see in the mirror. There, I knew there was a connection. =)
I love my time early in the morning when it is just me that is awake. I never used to be a morning person, and if you had told me 10yrs ago that I would just wake up with the sun, I'd have laughed in your face. But now after 10yrs of getting up to get kids out the door, dealing with an early rising toddler and all that mommy go to work stuff, I do wake up now that my kids sleep in! I love it, just time to reflect.
This time of year I thought would be less hectic, ha ha, joke is on me. I love when the kids are back in school, it means more routine. But along with that has come cross country, which was a new sport to our family, Wednesday night church night, football games, pumpkin patches, orchards, corn mazes, yard work, and all the other fun hoopla that just comes up in life, toss in a few family weddings and a town tragedy and whew...where is the time to just be?
This past week has been a bit calmer, well, sorta. The kids had MEA break, I had their conferences and work, we did do a family outing, and I had a great breakfast with an old neighbor friend. I really enjoyed that breakfast and time to just be. How simple and fun to just go out and share a meal and conversation. To be me, to be able to listen to her, to reconnect and to reflect. We need more time like that...all of us.
We all need some time to look back, sort through and just understand what was, if we don't, we'll never get to the next chapter of the book if we keep rereading the same one over and over...and I don't care what time of day you pick or if it's just once a week, find a little slice of it and just be. With that being said...
Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!
I love my time early in the morning when it is just me that is awake. I never used to be a morning person, and if you had told me 10yrs ago that I would just wake up with the sun, I'd have laughed in your face. But now after 10yrs of getting up to get kids out the door, dealing with an early rising toddler and all that mommy go to work stuff, I do wake up now that my kids sleep in! I love it, just time to reflect.
This time of year I thought would be less hectic, ha ha, joke is on me. I love when the kids are back in school, it means more routine. But along with that has come cross country, which was a new sport to our family, Wednesday night church night, football games, pumpkin patches, orchards, corn mazes, yard work, and all the other fun hoopla that just comes up in life, toss in a few family weddings and a town tragedy and whew...where is the time to just be?
This past week has been a bit calmer, well, sorta. The kids had MEA break, I had their conferences and work, we did do a family outing, and I had a great breakfast with an old neighbor friend. I really enjoyed that breakfast and time to just be. How simple and fun to just go out and share a meal and conversation. To be me, to be able to listen to her, to reconnect and to reflect. We need more time like that...all of us.
We all need some time to look back, sort through and just understand what was, if we don't, we'll never get to the next chapter of the book if we keep rereading the same one over and over...and I don't care what time of day you pick or if it's just once a week, find a little slice of it and just be. With that being said...
Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!
Friday, October 14, 2011
Great Minds Think Alike
They say mimicry is the best form of flattery...I'll admit, it took me years to understand this. I didn't like it if someone went out and got the same hair cut, sweater, bag, book, or even did the same activities as me. Man was I missing out on sharing with others then...
I used to get annoyed when someone would copy my idea's. I mean, I came up with them first, didn't I? I put them in action first, I wanted to be known as the first to do this or that. I'm not sure why that was so important to me or what changed my way of thinking on this, maybe having kids, watching how they copy what each other does in play and how they have this strong desire to emulate what their parents are doing.
We want our kids to grow up to be better versions of ourselves, how can they do that if they don't copy what we do, if we don't allow them to follow along? And I sure don't want them to copy bad ways. I also learned that it is more fun to share in these "idea's" with others and know that people are enjoying the same fun as me! I now see this with my own kids and their friends, I overhear their conversations about "so-and-so had to copy me." I recently responded with "hey, that just means they really liked your idea and must like you, who doesn't like being liked?!"
I also learned that by trying to be what I thought was an original and unique, meant I was limiting myself on experiences and sharing in things with others. (I do not mean you shouldn't be your own self) And to be honest, I really couldn't take credit for coming up with all these idea's on my own, really, I knew that I was going off of someone else's idea or wanting to bring it to my group of friends as well! Not only that, but really?? get over myself, I'm not the first to walk this side of the planet ;)
Over the past few days I have been trying to plan a Grils Night In. I enjoy hosting things, I enjoy people having fun and sharing in that fun with them. I have a few friends that sell certain things and I thought it would be fun to have an open house for them to showcase their homebased businesses and have a girls night with food, wine and just simple fun. Now, I know I'm not the first to come up with this idea, in fact, a friend just had one of these parties last month. Ironically another friend was thinking the same thing, only her party would be just one week before mine. Hey, they say great minds think alike! Now this does crack me up, make me smile and chuckle to myself, but it does not upset me, how could it when she is a friend and we had both been to a similar party...(timing is funny)? Now I get another chance to go celebrate and have fun with a group of ladies where I don't have to be the entertainer...and I can see how she does her party and put my own spin on mine =) Win win if you ask me!
So the next time you feel someone "steals" your idea, take a deep breath and think about how they must like you enough to want to do the same, it really IS a form of flattery, and I think we all enjoy an "attagirl!" every once in awhile. In my case it was great minds DO think alike. Hey, don't we want friends who enjoy similar things?
Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!
I used to get annoyed when someone would copy my idea's. I mean, I came up with them first, didn't I? I put them in action first, I wanted to be known as the first to do this or that. I'm not sure why that was so important to me or what changed my way of thinking on this, maybe having kids, watching how they copy what each other does in play and how they have this strong desire to emulate what their parents are doing.
We want our kids to grow up to be better versions of ourselves, how can they do that if they don't copy what we do, if we don't allow them to follow along? And I sure don't want them to copy bad ways. I also learned that it is more fun to share in these "idea's" with others and know that people are enjoying the same fun as me! I now see this with my own kids and their friends, I overhear their conversations about "so-and-so had to copy me." I recently responded with "hey, that just means they really liked your idea and must like you, who doesn't like being liked?!"
I also learned that by trying to be what I thought was an original and unique, meant I was limiting myself on experiences and sharing in things with others. (I do not mean you shouldn't be your own self) And to be honest, I really couldn't take credit for coming up with all these idea's on my own, really, I knew that I was going off of someone else's idea or wanting to bring it to my group of friends as well! Not only that, but really?? get over myself, I'm not the first to walk this side of the planet ;)
Over the past few days I have been trying to plan a Grils Night In. I enjoy hosting things, I enjoy people having fun and sharing in that fun with them. I have a few friends that sell certain things and I thought it would be fun to have an open house for them to showcase their homebased businesses and have a girls night with food, wine and just simple fun. Now, I know I'm not the first to come up with this idea, in fact, a friend just had one of these parties last month. Ironically another friend was thinking the same thing, only her party would be just one week before mine. Hey, they say great minds think alike! Now this does crack me up, make me smile and chuckle to myself, but it does not upset me, how could it when she is a friend and we had both been to a similar party...(timing is funny)? Now I get another chance to go celebrate and have fun with a group of ladies where I don't have to be the entertainer...and I can see how she does her party and put my own spin on mine =) Win win if you ask me!
So the next time you feel someone "steals" your idea, take a deep breath and think about how they must like you enough to want to do the same, it really IS a form of flattery, and I think we all enjoy an "attagirl!" every once in awhile. In my case it was great minds DO think alike. Hey, don't we want friends who enjoy similar things?
Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!
Monday, October 10, 2011
Shout, shout, let it all out...
Some days you just feel like shouting to the world...today is one of them, only I am not sure what I would shout. I know, weird for me, but honestly, I want to be heard, but at the same time I just want to quiet my heart. After all this emotion as of late, I just need.to.be. That's OK, right?
I know, weird to see from Ms. Positive-Happy-Go-Lucky, but I think it is important that I show others that I hurt too and can be a contemplation of emotions. I think my soul is telling me I need to recharge, need to be still, need to find that inner peace so I can shine on for my kids again.
How do I do that? I am the mom, single mom at that, and had to get all three kids out the door to school, myself. I had to let the dog out and feed him, started a load of laundry and now sit to catch up on the computer, but I found myself staring out the window at that wonderful dreamy light from the fall sunshine. I should go for a run, but the time it is now doesn't allow it. Exercise does make me feel better, it is my chance to zone out, exhaust the body, yet it makes me feel so good all over. When I run, I like to just get lost in the cadence of my feet, the rhythm of my breathing, let my mind wander and then that clarity comes. I love that zen feeling! I have to go to work this morning yet, I have to yet again put every one's needs before mine to be successful at what I do. I can look forward to a run or long walk after work. But what about right.now??? I want to be able to feel good about the day.
You can see that I don't like to feel "off" and that yes, I do have those days. Told you, I am human. It also helps for me to write or share if you will my thoughts to get them sorted through and not leave them a jumbled mess in my head...if I did, I would go to work with that "foggy" feeling and not be able to be present. My mind is wandering to my kids, will they be safe at school today, what is the mood for them with knowing it could be sad for them or others? How is Abby's family doing? What can I do to help? How can I be a better mom, friend, person in life??
Deep breath....in....out....in....out....calm. Lord, could you step in here? I can't control it. I didn't cause that accident, I didn't cause another family to be in pain, I can't protect my kids from what life hands them, BUT, I can teach them how to cope, how to continue to move forward in this life. I can go to work, listen to what others may need to say, I can be more quiet within today and just be present. The sun is shining, there is such pretty fall colors all around us, I've gotten to enjoy an abundance of time with my children as of late, I got to hug them good-bye. I have some nice running shoes to sit waiting by the door for my return from work, along with a 60lb furry monster who would love to run my butt. That is something to look forward to!
Whew, I already feel better, that pent up feeling of just needing to shout, is gone, (OK I did just open the door and shouted ;) and that Tears for Fears song is stuck in my head ). I will reflect a bit more as I get ready for work and be at peace with the start of my day. I wish you all that same sense of peace and ability to face what may lay ahead in your day!
Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!
I know, weird to see from Ms. Positive-Happy-Go-Lucky, but I think it is important that I show others that I hurt too and can be a contemplation of emotions. I think my soul is telling me I need to recharge, need to be still, need to find that inner peace so I can shine on for my kids again.
How do I do that? I am the mom, single mom at that, and had to get all three kids out the door to school, myself. I had to let the dog out and feed him, started a load of laundry and now sit to catch up on the computer, but I found myself staring out the window at that wonderful dreamy light from the fall sunshine. I should go for a run, but the time it is now doesn't allow it. Exercise does make me feel better, it is my chance to zone out, exhaust the body, yet it makes me feel so good all over. When I run, I like to just get lost in the cadence of my feet, the rhythm of my breathing, let my mind wander and then that clarity comes. I love that zen feeling! I have to go to work this morning yet, I have to yet again put every one's needs before mine to be successful at what I do. I can look forward to a run or long walk after work. But what about right.now??? I want to be able to feel good about the day.
You can see that I don't like to feel "off" and that yes, I do have those days. Told you, I am human. It also helps for me to write or share if you will my thoughts to get them sorted through and not leave them a jumbled mess in my head...if I did, I would go to work with that "foggy" feeling and not be able to be present. My mind is wandering to my kids, will they be safe at school today, what is the mood for them with knowing it could be sad for them or others? How is Abby's family doing? What can I do to help? How can I be a better mom, friend, person in life??
Deep breath....in....out....in....out....calm. Lord, could you step in here? I can't control it. I didn't cause that accident, I didn't cause another family to be in pain, I can't protect my kids from what life hands them, BUT, I can teach them how to cope, how to continue to move forward in this life. I can go to work, listen to what others may need to say, I can be more quiet within today and just be present. The sun is shining, there is such pretty fall colors all around us, I've gotten to enjoy an abundance of time with my children as of late, I got to hug them good-bye. I have some nice running shoes to sit waiting by the door for my return from work, along with a 60lb furry monster who would love to run my butt. That is something to look forward to!
Whew, I already feel better, that pent up feeling of just needing to shout, is gone, (OK I did just open the door and shouted ;) and that Tears for Fears song is stuck in my head ). I will reflect a bit more as I get ready for work and be at peace with the start of my day. I wish you all that same sense of peace and ability to face what may lay ahead in your day!
Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Children
For a long time it has really bothered me that there are parents out there that constantly complain about their kids. They come across as though their kids are such a burden to them rather than a blessing. That it as if these children are the root of their disdain towards life and the position they are currently in, it's called parenting. Well, let me bring you to my small town....maybe then these complainers will have a new outlook on their kids.
Our town was hit with yet another tragic loss this past weekend, a young girl was mercilessly hit by a semi...and that semi was not forgiving. The class of 2013 here in Small Town, USA lost yet another classmate...the second in two years. Now there is another family with an empty chair at the dinner table, classmates with an empty desk, neighbors who won't hear the laughter of this bright young lady any more. Dancing with Jesus she is.
We often look at others and think "Oh, that poor family, so glad it wasn't ours." But, what if it were? Would you feel horrible for yelling at your child yesterday when she spilled a whole gallon of milk while trying to get her own cereal because you were just trying to sleep in a little? Would you want to take back yelling at your son for him not taking the garbage out or emptying the dishwasher since you had told him three times earlier that day? What about that messy room, the wrong shirt, that stain on the carpet, the broken window...would any of that matter? I think not.
None of that little stuff matters; the mountains of laundry, dishes, scattered toys, the piles of papers from school, squabbling siblings, none of it, for it means we have our children to hold and love, a life to share with them.
Have you ever thought that maybe there is someone out there that would have loved to have had children, but medically couldn't? That there is a mom out there but because you never see her with a child it doesn't mean she didn't carry one within her only to either miscarry or for whatever reason gave her baby up for adoption? That lady at your child's school that may seem a little "stuck up" may have a terminally ill child at home and maybe that couple next door that seems to keep to themselves lost a child to an illness or like so many it seems in the town I reside in, to a tragic accident? But a lot of us are blessed with a child, something we can take for granted all too easily.
I am often approached by others and told, "Man, you sure do a lot with your kids!" Yes, yes I do. I had children by choice, I want them to feel part of my life, not like they are forcing me to give up part of my life to "raise" them. I'll have plenty of time to travel, host girls nights, enjoy couple time, have nice things and a clean house when they grow up (all too quickly), but for now I want to enjoy every.single.minute.of.life.with.them. I cannot protect them from everything or control every aspect of their lives, nor should I, but I do want to create tons of memories with them and help them learn all that life has to offer, mainly to live it LOUD! (thanks Jacob) I have learned all too well that life is fragile, tomorrow is never promised to us. I myself was in a bad car accident, lost a friend in an accident the very next night, I most recently lost a 14yr old cousin just two years ago...I am part of "that" family. If you have never personally known anyone who has gone through this, I am happy you haven't had to deal with it. I don't wish it upon anyone, it is not a badge of honor.
I ask all of you, please, hug your kids tighter, take a moment to really think about what is really upsetting, tell your kids and family how much you love them and they mean to you. Think about how it sounds when you gripe about your kids...some parent out there only wishes they had their child to clean up after. I often smile at the cranberry colored paint that stains my winter coat...I had just had it for three days when my youngest came to give me a hug when I walked in the door after work and he got it on this coat...I did not care that he did it, it actually made me cry because just the week before me, a classmate of mine lost her young son to an illness, she'll never ever have another of his handprints, even if on a new coat. Thank you Trae for letting me see that this was a blessing and nothing to be angered at =)
Children ARE blessings, not promised to us, but entrusted to our care. They are worth more than any prized possession in the world and can never be replaced. Enjoy them, spend time with them and just simply love them.
Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!
Our town was hit with yet another tragic loss this past weekend, a young girl was mercilessly hit by a semi...and that semi was not forgiving. The class of 2013 here in Small Town, USA lost yet another classmate...the second in two years. Now there is another family with an empty chair at the dinner table, classmates with an empty desk, neighbors who won't hear the laughter of this bright young lady any more. Dancing with Jesus she is.
We often look at others and think "Oh, that poor family, so glad it wasn't ours." But, what if it were? Would you feel horrible for yelling at your child yesterday when she spilled a whole gallon of milk while trying to get her own cereal because you were just trying to sleep in a little? Would you want to take back yelling at your son for him not taking the garbage out or emptying the dishwasher since you had told him three times earlier that day? What about that messy room, the wrong shirt, that stain on the carpet, the broken window...would any of that matter? I think not.
None of that little stuff matters; the mountains of laundry, dishes, scattered toys, the piles of papers from school, squabbling siblings, none of it, for it means we have our children to hold and love, a life to share with them.
Have you ever thought that maybe there is someone out there that would have loved to have had children, but medically couldn't? That there is a mom out there but because you never see her with a child it doesn't mean she didn't carry one within her only to either miscarry or for whatever reason gave her baby up for adoption? That lady at your child's school that may seem a little "stuck up" may have a terminally ill child at home and maybe that couple next door that seems to keep to themselves lost a child to an illness or like so many it seems in the town I reside in, to a tragic accident? But a lot of us are blessed with a child, something we can take for granted all too easily.
I am often approached by others and told, "Man, you sure do a lot with your kids!" Yes, yes I do. I had children by choice, I want them to feel part of my life, not like they are forcing me to give up part of my life to "raise" them. I'll have plenty of time to travel, host girls nights, enjoy couple time, have nice things and a clean house when they grow up (all too quickly), but for now I want to enjoy every.single.minute.of.life.with.them. I cannot protect them from everything or control every aspect of their lives, nor should I, but I do want to create tons of memories with them and help them learn all that life has to offer, mainly to live it LOUD! (thanks Jacob) I have learned all too well that life is fragile, tomorrow is never promised to us. I myself was in a bad car accident, lost a friend in an accident the very next night, I most recently lost a 14yr old cousin just two years ago...I am part of "that" family. If you have never personally known anyone who has gone through this, I am happy you haven't had to deal with it. I don't wish it upon anyone, it is not a badge of honor.
I ask all of you, please, hug your kids tighter, take a moment to really think about what is really upsetting, tell your kids and family how much you love them and they mean to you. Think about how it sounds when you gripe about your kids...some parent out there only wishes they had their child to clean up after. I often smile at the cranberry colored paint that stains my winter coat...I had just had it for three days when my youngest came to give me a hug when I walked in the door after work and he got it on this coat...I did not care that he did it, it actually made me cry because just the week before me, a classmate of mine lost her young son to an illness, she'll never ever have another of his handprints, even if on a new coat. Thank you Trae for letting me see that this was a blessing and nothing to be angered at =)
Children ARE blessings, not promised to us, but entrusted to our care. They are worth more than any prized possession in the world and can never be replaced. Enjoy them, spend time with them and just simply love them.
Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!
Friday, October 7, 2011
Pink
I have mixed emotions about all the pink breast cancer awareness products out there. Pink this, pink that, ribbons, slogans, fund raising....it seems like all of big business world has jumped on the bandwagon. While I agree that awareness and early detection is key; working towards quality treatments, and yes, I'd love to see a "cure" I don't like that it seems to be such big business propaganda and I really would love to know what exactly the researchers do with all that money.
Breast cancer IS something of great importance to me. I have boobs, I have a daughter. But, I've also had an aunt pass away from this disease along with see a family friend who happens to have been the mother to my daughter's friend leave us too soon and just a month ago took Mr. Man's aunt's life as well. I have seen first hand these STRONG women take this disease on with admirable courage. They all chose different means of dealing with their personal path with breast cancer...and the outcome was the same.
Up until this past May, I never really understood the big walks or races in honor of this cause. I have had mixed emotions on all the "hype" that has gone with it. My daughter and I decided we'd go do the Susan G. Komen 5K on Mother's Day. It was important to HER as she just watched her good friends mother pass of breast cancer. OK, we signed up, raised some cash and off we went. No expectations. Wow...was I wrong about these things. You all know me and my feelings on Karma...I let go of the fact that there are things about such organizations that I don't always feel at peace with and I said to myself, "I am putting positive thoughts out on this money and why we are here, the rest will do it's own work." And it did! I was overwhelmed with such love for strangers, for women, for survivors...I was AMAZED! The opening ceremony was beyond touching, the SEA, and I mean SEA of people was shocking, the signs, the shirts, the hug a survivor corner...yes, it was all inspiring to me.
At this time I am making up my mind that I will wear pink every Friday for the month of October to show my love and memories of these three women in my life that have gone before me. I want to remember them as the strong women they were. I don't need a special ribbon, I don't need a slogan, I just want to keep their memories alive in my heart as I don't want their lives defined by some ad campaign, they were so much more to the world than that. If a product I normally purchase is toting the pink ribbon, I'll still buy it and smile in their honor, but I don't have to go out of my way to buy everything that is all of a sudden supporting this cause. I will continue to run the 5K on Mother's Day with my daughter and keep us aware of the strength we all have within us.
Life is good, get on with it!
Breast cancer IS something of great importance to me. I have boobs, I have a daughter. But, I've also had an aunt pass away from this disease along with see a family friend who happens to have been the mother to my daughter's friend leave us too soon and just a month ago took Mr. Man's aunt's life as well. I have seen first hand these STRONG women take this disease on with admirable courage. They all chose different means of dealing with their personal path with breast cancer...and the outcome was the same.
Up until this past May, I never really understood the big walks or races in honor of this cause. I have had mixed emotions on all the "hype" that has gone with it. My daughter and I decided we'd go do the Susan G. Komen 5K on Mother's Day. It was important to HER as she just watched her good friends mother pass of breast cancer. OK, we signed up, raised some cash and off we went. No expectations. Wow...was I wrong about these things. You all know me and my feelings on Karma...I let go of the fact that there are things about such organizations that I don't always feel at peace with and I said to myself, "I am putting positive thoughts out on this money and why we are here, the rest will do it's own work." And it did! I was overwhelmed with such love for strangers, for women, for survivors...I was AMAZED! The opening ceremony was beyond touching, the SEA, and I mean SEA of people was shocking, the signs, the shirts, the hug a survivor corner...yes, it was all inspiring to me.
At this time I am making up my mind that I will wear pink every Friday for the month of October to show my love and memories of these three women in my life that have gone before me. I want to remember them as the strong women they were. I don't need a special ribbon, I don't need a slogan, I just want to keep their memories alive in my heart as I don't want their lives defined by some ad campaign, they were so much more to the world than that. If a product I normally purchase is toting the pink ribbon, I'll still buy it and smile in their honor, but I don't have to go out of my way to buy everything that is all of a sudden supporting this cause. I will continue to run the 5K on Mother's Day with my daughter and keep us aware of the strength we all have within us.
Life is good, get on with it!
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