Sunday, November 6, 2011

Hoping for Coping

In my last post I talked about life not meaning to be a roller coaster ride, and I had a few great discussions on this very topic...along with coping skills. I know the world is lacking in those, and once we find ways of coping, that roller coaster is more of just a journey that you know how to take the ups and downs in stride! I personally LOVE roller coasters ;)

Yes, coping skills, something I am working hard on myself and trying to instill in my children. I don't want to raise kids who cannot deal with what comes their way, don't want them to be the type of people who just lash out and react instead of taking in what happens and coming up with a plan of action. I also want them to be accepting. Now, accepting doesn't mean we have to like something or even condone it, it simply means we understand that we can't change what it is, but need to change the way WE look at it or deal with it.

I also want to raise children who don't have a sense of entitlement. That is such a dangerous "trait" if you ask me.  To think that because we can or that we are deserving of something sets one up for such an angry way of life. For one, we are all deserving of love and acceptance. To want to exclude others from this is selfish and to think that we are owed anything is also selfish. It breeds such anger within one that it comes out to others in such negativity.

We all know such people. Look at our politicians ;)  hahah  But seriously, we've all had those people come across our paths, the ones who lash out, project anger and feel entitled. Those are the people my heart goes out to and makes me really just want to love them all the more, they are lacking unconditional love and acceptance.

Just because I do hair for a living, doesn't mean that I am owed clients or business. I volunteer for my community, doesn't mean I am deserving of any big thanks or recognition. I am a hard working, single mom, doesn't mean I deserve a big break. I have the life and people in it by MY choices, MY hard work, and what MY priorities are. See, we are given free will, a way to choose how we deal with things, nothing is OWED to us.  Once we have a better understanding of this, life really seems to flow much easier.

Now, I could list a whole laundry list of things that have gone bad in my life, for starters, yes, I've broken seven bones. Does that mean I just lay there and fixate on my aches and pains...no, I even got up and was a cheerleader WITH a broken leg that had a metal rod in it. Yes, I've gone through a divorce, I've had my fair share of horrible debt and living paycheck to paycheck. My house is not new or full of new, but it is a roof over mine and my kids' heads!  I have three kids who mean the world to me, but are my sole responsibility...for any of you other single mom's out there, you know IF you do the every other weekend stint, your kids' dad can still refuse to take the kids, the kids may want to just stay with you or you spend your "weekend off" working to make extra money for your household. These are all things that make me me, make me stronger and along the way have helped me cope with what ever else life has tossed my way!

We never know what the other person we come across has gone through either, so I am not trying to pass judgement on anyone, just trying to convey that we all need to be accepted. I hope those who are lashing out find what it is they need to feel that unconditional love and acceptance, that they can find a way to cope with whatever has come their way and I truly hope that they can find kindness...people to be kind to them and for them to return that kindness, just because. I believe that cope rhymes with hope for a reason, because without hope, we cannot cope!

Life is good, get on with it, live it LOUD!

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